Thanks for the continued sarcasm. I would ask you to perform the stated use case again just to be sure.
You apparently have a magical SP3, either that or the i3 version has considerable less fan noise, which might be likely as it produces less heat.
It's certainly not 'deafening' -not that I've seen anyone claim that. However it can be distracting and can get loud. Users are not simply lying / or making this up. There are plenty of youtube videos where people have recorded the fan noise also. I have seen my i5 version produce sounds similar to the video I'm linking to below both during video play back and while using the screen saver on AC power.
That or his hearing is slightly sub-par.