Laugh Of The Day-Add Yours Here

[Jeffrey]

Marriage Counseling:

After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came for counseling. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married.

On and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured.

Finally, after allowing this for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking the wife to stand, embraced and kissed her passionately as her husband watched with a raised eyebrow. The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze. The therapist turned to the husband and said, 'this is what your wife needs at least 3 times a week. Can you do this?'

'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish.'

 

[Jeffrey]

Bringing Home A Drunk


A guy was in a bar about as drunk as its possible to get.

A group of guys notice his condition and decide to be good Samaritans and take him home.

First they stand him up to get to his wallet so they can find out where he lives, but he keeps falling down. He fell down eight more times on the way to the car, each time with a real thud.

After they get to his house, he falls down another four times getting him to the door. His wife comes to the door, and one guy says, "We brought your husband home."





The wife asks, "Where's his wheelchair?"

 

[fartooti]

Marriage Counseling:

After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came for counseling. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married.

On and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured.

Finally, after allowing this for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking the wife to stand, embraced and kissed her passionately as her husband watched with a raised eyebrow. The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze. The therapist turned to the husband and said, 'this is what your wife needs at least 3 times a week. Can you do this?'

'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish.'

yesterday i read it in "20000 Jokes" app...

 

[s-tabletfan]

My trip to the store

There was a bit of confusion at the store this morning. When I was
ready to pay for my groceries, the cashier said, "Strip down facing me."

Making a mental note to complain to my congressman about Homeland
Security running amok, I did just as she had instructed.

When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out
that she was referring to my credit card.

I have been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.

They need to make their instructions to us seniors a little clearer!

 

[Jeffrey]

Let's Not Read Into This

[video=youtube;FpZkf7_ZjsY]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FpZkf7_ZjsY&feature=player_embedded[/video]​

 

[Jeffrey]

My Favorate

[video=youtube;RW8BKYnO10E]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RW8BKYnO10E[/video]​

 

[fosking]

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[Astrix]

 

[Astrix]

Fav spot the different
Anyone can spot the snipper?

 

[Ben_J_H]

I can't find anything LOL Are you lying? I don't think there's a snipper in there

 

[Astrix]

I can't find anything LOL Are you lying? I don't think there's a snipper in there

Take a look again:
1st clue more towards left of the image.

 

[Ben_J_H]

That's not it in the upper left is it?